for everything, a reason

Conclusion

2012-01-16T20:47:00.000Z

I think it's time to wrap things up here and move.

Too many selfish mistakes on my part and time to let things go. I'm perpetually become an increasingly bad person by accident and I need to do something about it.

So I am. Petty as it may seem, it has to be done. And I am sorry for causing upset.

Laggard

2012-01-16T15:08:00.000Z

I spent the very vast majority of my weekend already studying for my final paper, ready to sit the exam in March some time. I figured mid-March.

February 28th, apparently. Shitting hell. That's a lot sooner than I would like.

At one point, I stopped reading the giant text book, to sit down and watch Sherlock. Which was epic - I may or may not have a man-crush on Benedict Cumberbatch.

Frosty

2012-01-14T11:42:00.000Z

It's cold. I need to get up, get dressed, sort my washing and shave.

Fucking shaving. Why does my face insist on pushing out piano wire so damned frequently?

Push

2012-01-13T13:40:00.000Z

I should be in a better mood than I currently am, but while I have passed a paper I was convinced hadn't gone so well, it has now dawned on me that the final paper will be seriously hard.

So I don't even get a weekend off before starting. I can sit the paper in March and then in May if unsuccessful, but here's hoping that it's all done soon.

And I am still absurdly tired.

The golden age

2012-01-12T03:17:00.001Z

I can't sleep.

This is the result of waiting for, well, results. I hate it. I fucking hate it with every fibre of my being and wish one day that I could just sleep and wait until the morning to have my fate revealed to me.

No. Instead the emails are automated and arrive between midnight and some other hour in the morning, usually before midday. Invariably, my mark is emailed to me at an unholy hour. I will have managed about thirty minutes of being asleep, constantly waking to check for new emails.

Then the disappointment of seeing a narrow failure and then sleep can resume.

Only this time, something is a bit different. The email is still not exactly great in timing, but something was missing - where it's meant to say "FAIL" it didn't. Instead, it said "PASS".

Result. One more to go ... and free forever.

Consideration

2012-01-11T11:44:00.000Z

Recently, my decent leather shoes died on me. Not because they fell apart as such, but because the sole of the left shoe wore through, where I constantly press the clutch in my car to change gear. In fairness, it's taken three years.

Now I wear trainers in the car and swap when I arrive at my destination. Like a woman wearing heels.

So where's this going? Nowhere exciting, but my shoes were in the boot of the car. Upon opening said boot, I saw a long, long tube of Jaffa Cakes that my mum gave me at Christmas. What a bonus. I slipped one of the boxes out of the longer box and shoved into my bag.

Being the generous soul I am, I bought coffee for Simon and myself and proceeded to dish out a box to other people in my department ... before realising that I was only left with two for myself.

Fail.

Wasted daylight

2012-01-10T11:40:00.000Z

With direct reference to my last entry, I am curious in my own mind as to whether or not knowing that someone very specific and important (to me) could read my blog at any time, will influence the way I post.

There are so many media outlets (social and otherwise) today, that it's almost impossible to completely sever ties with another human, when they might have chosen to be digitally omnipresent.

But then there's the choice of looking or not. Can you really put cake in front of a fat child and say "don't touch"? Not that I would describe my blog as cake and a fat kid as you, but I think the point is clear.

Reading a blog is entirely anonymous, unless a person chooses to comment. While I will never know if someone is still frequenting for sure, I think I know in my heart if they will be.

So will it sway my style and content of posting? Almost certainly.

Which leads to a dilemma. Does this become a corner of the web for me to leave hidden meanings and mystery (quite good already, aren't I?), or do I continue to write inane bullshit that nobody cares for?

Ether

2012-01-09T10:35:00.000Z

When you know specifically whom your audience may be, it makes blogging tricky at times - especially when you think that something might be misconstrued (unintentionally).

Some things are just plain difficult.

Even when I know that the truth of the matter is such, the reality is that I can hold on to a semblance of hope that as grown adults, of sound mind and matter, we will absolutely talk again.

One day.

Idus Martii

2012-01-08T12:30:00.000Z

And not a whole lot else to say.

Risk

2012-01-07T14:13:00.000Z

Ever taken a chance, enjoyed it and then been slapped hard in the face and regretted it? Sure, we all have no doubt. But it's better to take that risk sometimes, as hard as it may seem.

The point of no return was miles back. It has to be the right one this time.

Broken

2012-01-06T18:43:00.000Z

A promise. Solid in intent, hollow in delivery. Sometimes, it just can't be helped at all. Sometimes, there are certain promises you know you'll break in an instant, given a chance.

And I am glad I did - I can't sit back and be a spectator any longer.

Hopeless

2012-01-06T00:26:00.000Z

Sitting. Watching. Waiting. For anything. Something. A sign?

Just wanting to know. Needing that gut-wrenching feeling to be released.

Fear that it will stay there for the rest of your life. That it will never recede. Agonising.

Encounter

2012-01-05T11:56:00.000Z

I took a brave step yesterday, in admitting that I am human. That I am at times, selfish, unkind, spiteful and entirely wrong. That I get scared, panic and run away in stupidity.

But most of all, that I can't change. Who I am is who I am. I want the same things I always have done, and won't settle for anything but the best.

A question

2012-01-04T08:39:00.000Z

I'm exhausted.

Work is testing my resolve.

People are making me second guess myself.

My ability to make decisions is really being called into play here.

Surprised?

2012-01-03T10:27:00.000Z

The only day I didn't have an email sent to me in my work inbox over the holiday period (21st Dec to 3rd Jan), was January 1st. Seriously - emails at all hours, all day. It's unbelievable what happens when people have a Blackberry device.

Yet genuinely amazed that for a whole day, I had nothing.

New Start

2012-01-02T18:55:00.000Z

For the most part, I make reasonable sound decisions.

But when I don't, they're shit decisions that could be articulated in an entirely different manner altogether and save face for all.

I'm a bit useless at times.

Small change

2011-10-11T15:29:00.001+01:00

So a bit of coaxing and I have a new job title (for now). Finance Business Partner. Not bad really - makes me sound more important than I probably am, but that works for me.

I am also a bit late to the Arcade Fire bandwagon, but I'm really enjoying their sound, which was unexpected - I thought they were a passing fad. Oops!

Oh and back to scarf weather. This makes me happy, as I can hide my face a lot.

The beginning of the twist

2011-10-10T08:58:00.000+01:00

It's giving blood day today, and finally I am allowed to donate again (what with travel to the Caribbean and Dubai ruling that out a few months prior).

Bonuses to giving blood are that people think you're awesome and 'brave' (because invariably they are scared of needles), you get a wee biscuit and a drink, sometimes a really good looking nurse leans over you a lot to make sure everything is going okay and you also lose some weight (albeit temporarily).

I also like getting the free plastic key-loop things that have your blood group displayed on them, mainly because I am a non-common blood group (B+) and people notice it when you leave keys laying around. A surprisingly good topic of conversation.

Most ironically, I've been spending my life walking around with about 7 pints of "be positive" and yet am so unbearably cynical at times.

Still, work is keeping me happily entertained to the point where I am enjoying that feeling of appreciation that sometimes otherwise goes amiss.

Priority

2011-10-06T10:02:00.000+01:00

Have you ever found a reason to want to actually stay at work and not go home? I thought not.

I would have normally agreed with you there, but the more recent work has been pretty enjoyable, particularly some of the people I get to work with. So much so, that I just want to get more work done and prove my worth to my manager (and her manager).

Yeah, corporate whore, I know. But when people are actually grateful for the things you can do and make a point of telling you, who am I to turn down compliments? And copious amounts of Costa Coffee?

Intrigue

2011-10-04T10:23:00.000+01:00

The buses analogy. So cliched, yet so perfectly true most of the time.

Moving on to things of a less vague nature, Summer is here! Oh wait, it's gone again. It's almost Winter now. Having a 10 degree (C) drop from one day to the next is quite alarming when you are not wearing a jacket and that my friends, is a fact.

The love for music is remaining. It helps that I have my own office again at work, plenty of crap spreadsheets to fix, ridiculous demands from the work-generation tool (my colleague - generally more of the 'tool' part), who is set to become my manager's manager (groan) and generally finding that I want to do my work instead of slack off.

It won't last. Something shiny will distract me sooner or later and my 'good' working phase will grind to a resounding halt.

Recovery

2011-09-23T00:50:00.003+01:00

Well, it looks as if the nose and chin are definitely here to stay.

No more random "malware" bollocks from the random world of the Internet. Proof that you can't trust just anyone, if you ever needed it.

Anyhow. I listened to The Thrills the other day. This evening, I have listened to the Cardigans and now I am listening to the Futureheads. Interesting and awesome sounding over the valves and cans. I think I am loving my music again.

At last.

Sadness

2011-09-21T10:50:00.000+01:00

Well somehow, an utter prick has managed to get some code injected onto their blog (it doesn't appear to be mine), and because my blog linked to theirs, mine flagged as an issue.

Hence the new layout tinkering to try and find dodgy code is NOT fun at all, even for a nerd. In fact, nerdier people had to be drafted in to help. It seems okay, but if you get a warning, can you drop me a comment?

As it stands, I may be forced to relocate ... but I would like to avoid that if possible. Fingers crossed!

Odd!

2011-09-20T21:27:00.001+01:00

There's nothing wrong with my site; no viruses here or malware. Currently liaising with Google/Blogger to get it sorted. Sit tight!

It's ... alive!

2011-09-10T11:07:00.003+01:00

Yes, my nergasm triumphs. The new PC is built.

Alas I have chores to do first really, mainly cleaning, which is tricky when you want to do other things. More so, when the cleaning required is washing and the washing machine is royally fucked (the filter is clear but it won't drain).

Bollocks. I hate hand washing.

Rekindle

2011-09-09T15:27:00.001+01:00

Oh hello there! Genuinely forgot I had a blog there for a few days. Contending with super-busy work commitments and a colleague who can ~~go forth and multiply~~ fuck off.

I also found myself selling spare things to fund a new computer, despite being able to afford it anyway - seemed like the grown-up thing to do really. Still, it will allow me to edit the many videos I shot on my HD camcorder much faster than the aging craptop.

I even sold the Xbox 360 and a spare Wii (don't ask why there was a spare one ... ).

So yeah, killing time before I go home and build the new computer. I'm such a dork, but not a real dork, because I am recipient of regular intercourse. Hooray!

Dislike

2011-09-04T16:53:00.000+01:00

Computer exam? Shoddy handwriting and poor layout certainly not an issue. Questions that don't pertain to good use of a computer? Much more of an issue.

Frustrating, absolutely. I know it hasn't gone that well, but it's only an exam - nothing to get too bogged down by. He says. Fuckers. Why weren't there questions that I could have really nailed my Excel skills with?

Le sigh.

Dawn

2011-09-02T14:24:00.002+01:00

It's here. Well, more or less. Exam day tomorrow. I am not at all excited, as I am still having epic fail on Anna's birthday. I did, however, manage to pick up some rather epic home-made cheesecake from Dafna's, so at least all is not lost at this point.

Got some time out with the kite last night, but this time ironically, it was not windy enough (!). There was a bit of a breeze, but not enough for prolonged fun. Oh well.

Time for more study and fretting about Anna's birthday.

Almost here

2011-09-01T11:58:00.000+01:00

Well, September has slipped onto the radar all of a sudden. It's not a big deal, but interesting that it's warmer today than it has been the last week (and drier). Let's hope for an Indian summer or whatever they call it.

Exam in two days and still need to figure out Anna's birthday ... every time I get an idea, I doubt myself, try and speak to Anna about it, get the "that would have been a great surprise" response and realise now it's too late and back to the drawing board.

Fuck-fuck-fuckitty.

Tricks

2011-08-29T08:35:00.000+01:00

Seagulls.

They quite literally spend all morning fucking on the roof above the bedroom and as soon as you then decide you are awake and that there's not a lot you can do about it, the noise stops.

These mother-fuckers have simply got to go. I should probably not discuss at this point, some of the unique and interesting ways I have read about dispatching them, but suffice to say, my method will absolutely work. I just need patience.

And I have loads of that, surely?

Bright

2011-08-28T08:20:00.001+01:00

As I begin writing this short and sweet passage, I note that it is 0819 on a Sunday morning of a Bank Holiday weekend. The sun is shining, the rain falling (yes) and the seagulls annoying.

Time to start studying again I think. I had visions of power kite fun later in the day, but the rain looks like it's putting a stop to that - as it has on four occasions this week that I have planned in the back of my mind as time to exercise with the kite.

God that makes me sound desperate - more so than perhaps I already am.

Resounding

2011-08-23T18:23:00.000+01:00

And on the study goes. I'm desperate to do anything else, but sadly, I am seemingly a bit too sensible at the moment. Which is likely a good thing, in reality. I think?

Would be nice to be done and dusted and never have to do exams again ... not long to go ...

Stitch

2011-08-20T11:02:00.000+01:00

Busiest time of the year, right?

So my new team consists of 75% new starters, myself included. The boss is out for two weeks. The one who knows how to do everything is off on maternity leave. One doesn't do Fridays and the other is the new graduate.

Leaving me to pick up all the shit and flak that nobody else can/will deal with.

It's a fucking hard knock life, isn't it?

Ride, Sally, ride

2011-08-14T21:10:00.000+01:00

Well, I did find time to take the power kite out yesterday. The weather was fairly calm, but not entirely still by the afternoon, so I finished the shopping and proceeded to head out to the promenade by the river to take flight.

Let's be clear here - four lines are 2x messier than two lines. Easy set-up on two, harder on four - mainly because the previous owner wraps different to me (it was second-hand - saved a fortune on something that is otherwise around £200!), which means it unwinds differently than anticipated.

After some messing around, I parked the kite ready to go; brake lines secured with stakes (tent pegs), so the kite sat upright, inflated, and ready to go. Kite un-staked, a quick pull on the handles, and she's in the air.

And back on the ground, the wrong way up, lines twisted. Bugger. It really doesn't help when people are watching, making me a bit embarrassed, but I got on with it. Got her up the right way again, parked it (by tilting the bars forward putting tension on the brakes) and prepared to fly.

Oh and fly she did - taking me by surprise when hitting the power window - the fucker was angry and despite leaning back into my imaginary chair, I needed to run downwind in order to not 'superman' (fall flat on my face).

Some epic pull on this thing, seriously. Totally unprepared for what appeared to be 'calm' wind - it was a fair bit gusty, making the flight a bit unpredictable and causing a few blushes when I stacked the fucker without warning ... quite close to gormless spectators, who appeared slightly bemused that the power-kite was taking me for a ride, more than I was taking it.

So a few failed flights later and many unravelling of lines (!), it was time to go. Parking and packing the kite was very easy with the brakes (something you can't easily do on two lines without a helper), which was nice. But some lessons learned here:

Bring a friend if possible. It's probably easier to untangle problems (for novices) and you have someone else to look at and laugh at how strong the bastard is.
Stretch before beginning your flight. Today, I hurt like a motherfucker. Honestly - I'm quite strong given my build, and I feel like I've run a marathon. There is pain in muscles I've never used before, and I really have done strange things in the past.
Find somewhere less gusty to learn - it was far stronger than I anticipated and could easily have been overwhelmed if not paying attention and exerting my full strength. It wasn't even 15mph wind.
Make sure that the person that winds up the lines, is the same that unwinds.
Bring 2l bottles of water to weigh down the leading edges of the kite - bring many. I didn't have enough and it was a struggle to set up at first.
Admit defeat and take a break to think about what's going wrong (usually the human and not the kite); don't panic - pull on the brakes and try again.
Be honest with your limits and abilities and learn from the experience each time!

But you know what? I had a lot of fun. It's a great resistance exercise, but I definitely need more friends to fuck around with and laugh at. Below is an iPhone shot while the bastard was sat peacefully and not trying to tear my arms out of their sockets.

Solemn

2011-08-13T09:44:00.000+01:00

The never-ending study resumes. Almost there, almost another £10k-£15k increase to salary, if indications hold true. Would certainly be nice, that's for sure, but absolutely worth the hard work.

In the meantime, I have entered a perceivably 'odd' activity of power-kiting. It's honestly quite 'kiddie' to look at, but highly addictive and surprisingly quite dangerous. Or not surprisingly, given the natural selection that takes place on a daily basis.

The start was a 2-line 2.1m jobbie. It's good fun and very capable in high winds. Naturally, I wanted something bigger. A 4.0m arrived the other day, which this time is four lines (the extra two are brakes), and much better for pulling you about (and lifting you clean off your feet).

Hoping to get out later after some nerding around with CIMA work, but it looks remarkably still here in Liverpool today. For a change.

Good day

2011-08-09T20:17:00.004+01:00

Hello there! It's August!

What better way to welcome in the month, than to break out in mass riots, nay - vandalism?

Hooray for retards!

Escaped

2011-07-31T11:10:00.000+01:00

So the last day of July is today and luckily, I had a really good, no, great idea for a blog post last night.

Sadly, it has escaped my mind, as I was rudely awakened by seagulls performing the Monster Mash on the roof of our apartment building and screeching along somewhat out of tune.

Instead, I am pre-empting you of a newspaper headline likely to roll this week, something along the lines of: "Bean-counter goes on seagull-culling rampage in Liverpool city centre".

Riled.

Come back

2011-07-23T15:53:00.000+01:00

Don't get me wrong - I don't mind Winter much, other than the inflated energy bills, but seriously - where the fuck has Summer gone?

Looking out of the window, one would be forgiven for believing that Summer's still there, but let me categorically tell you that it is not - it's too windy and far too cold.

What a crock. Bah.

Slide

2011-07-18T22:49:00.000+01:00

Yeah, kinda forgot to mention that I was away for 9 days in Northern Ireland (through July 12th, I might add ... ). Back now though, so you can hold your breath and wait for an update as to my goings on.

Other than passing two more CIMA exams, mother-fuckers!

Super

2011-07-06T16:52:00.000+01:00

As in, I am super tired.

Stupid 4.45am wake-up again while the Eastern world tries their hardest to wind me the fuck up with super-stupid questions that arise as a result of complete incompetence. Sigh

At least I can go in to work at a normal time tomorrow. I will cherish those extra two hours in bed like nothing I've ever cherished before.

Mistake

2011-07-01T06:23:00.000+01:00

It's financial month-end again, what with it being the first day of the new month.

Muggins here had to cover early hours (for Asian/Oceanic) support for people who can't do accounting properly, or late for Latin America. I chose the early hours. 0800-1400 today, and 0600-1300 Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.

Only I may have accidentally come in at 0600 today, as well. Time for a nap under my desk (and I am absolutely not joking in the slightest).

Sweet dreams!

Succinct

2011-06-29T18:23:00.002+01:00

Today, I have little to complain about.

Well, other than the price of diesel.

That is all.

Spruce

2011-06-25T11:04:00.000+01:00

Today, I am mostly cleaning. Mainly, because it needs doing. But also partly because I feel a bit guilty that I am abandoning Anna to sod off and visit my old house-mate from uni and get a few drinks down my neck, coming back tomorrow.

My rather skewed man logic believes that a clean, happy apartment, means a (clean?) happy partner. Emphasis on the latter - happy. Fingers crossed with that one.

It also occurred to me that there are a lot of things that I have slipped behind with addressing ... but I will figure that out eventually.

Some mini reviews of films I have watched lately on Blu Ray:

Unstoppable: average, mildly entertaining - if massively predictable.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid Rodrick Rules: pretty good and appeals to many ages (much like the first). Underrated in my opinion.

Tron Legacy: I really liked this, but if you didn't see/like the first, I would skip it. Daft Punk made an epic job of the soundtrack, which is worth a listen if you are that way inclined.

Battle Los Angeles: very low expectations from me, so it was better than I thought. Still not great, but mindless entertainment.

Oh yeah - I'm listening to Parov Stelar at the moment and strangely, it's massively enjoyable.

Fatigue

2011-06-24T18:09:00.000+01:00

I am tired. Just generally. Eating well, working sensible hours, getting (s)exercise getting enough sleep, not ill.

Etc, etc.

Just tired. Lethargic. Lazy. Bored. You get the idea - and naturally, the blogging suffers.

Overcome

2011-06-17T13:39:00.001+01:00

It's got me.

General tickly throat become epic painful chesty cough and an ulcer makes it impossible to talk/eat properly. I succumbed and took a day off work.

Such a wuss.

Carry on regardless

2011-06-15T08:48:00.000+01:00

Still not feeling quite 100% and have managed to somehow bite my tongue and cause a small ulcer that makes it difficult to talk (!) and eat. This does not bode well, given that those are two things I like to do when I am at work.

I can at least continue to browse the Internet instead of doing productive work, I suppose. My boss gave me some work last Wednesday, to be done by 8th July. I finished it last night. Excel spreadsheets are pretty easy for me these days, but it's surprising how much things like this can be taken for granted when it becomes 'the norm'.

What a fucking nerd I am.

That one

2011-06-14T20:25:00.000+01:00

I may have mild man flu. Or similar symptoms. I do however, find it inexcusable to take a day off work as a result. If I'm feeling a bit shit, I want to make sure as many people know about it as possible.

Starting with you.

Mindful

2011-06-02T11:35:00.000+01:00

Never go to sleep with something on your mind - particularly where partners are in extremely bad moods with one another. Not only does it mean you haven't sorted out your issues, it means that your sleep is dreadful and your following day is ruined too.

We all know this, but never manage to adhere to our own words of advice, do we?

Pinned

2011-05-27T20:55:00.003+01:00

So given that my work project ceases to need me from the end of September, I casually but formally chatted with my boss about my desire to not leave (despite a very healthy ~£10k redundancy payment) and that I wanted to do something challenging going forward, as the work I am currently doing is not in any way, shape, or form, challenging me in the slightest.

Blowing my own trumpet, yes - as some would find it quite hard, but computing and nerdy programming-esque tasks are natural to me. Being a nerd and all that.

I had already found out through snooping that she had been applying for other roles in the business area we reside, but hadn't yet known she got it ... but I figured she did. The new role she is doing needs someone with appropriate skills to assist.

And apparently, I'm the prime candidate from what I garnered (rather, she wants me to do it and her boss even suggested me), but I also got the feeling my boss wanted to see some real signs of longer-term commitment etcetera, which is no problem if there's a good role to keep me interested. Could well be up a pay bracket too, which is potentially from £5k-£10k a year more than what I get at the moment - but I would happily stay on what I earn if it means a decent job to do (again!).

It does mean however, that I would have to turn down an opportunity to lead audit a group of 10 people in the USA in September (literally auditing the entire US market's compliance to Sarbanes-Oxley), but hey-ho. Would be nice to land on my feet again - as well as passing a couple of the damned exams!

Edging closer

2011-05-26T08:25:00.000+01:00

Final strategic paper today, but I'll be honest ... I did spend a few hours making some notes last night, but I doubt it will make much of an impact on the questions today. Financial Strategy (F3) is pretty much revolting - and requires an enormous amount of work in itself.

Here's to a planned re-sit in September ... but hoping it doesn't clash with a potential lead audit in the USA for two weeks, as I need some cut-price American goods again.

Decision

2011-05-25T14:10:00.000+01:00

That's number two done. Exams that is - my bowel movements are actually a little shy today, surprisingly.

But it leaves me with a bit of a quandary as a result. I deliberately focused my revision time on exams one and two ... with a view to taking three as a 're-sit' on its own, because you have to do all three in one sitting the first time around.

So do I cram in a few hours of study that will almost certainly be of little benefit, or do I relax and pretend it's all over? Either way I have to sit for three more hours tomorrow and answer the paper as best I can ... can't help but think I am going to do the latter.

Hurdle

2011-05-24T18:10:00.000+01:00

The first one is down.

One of those exams where you feel somewhat indifferent about it all. I know some people found parts hard that I didn't and vice versa, so here's hoping to a magic pass mark. Another two to go, but not expecting anything to come of the third, as I have not put as much time/effort in to it (deliberately).

I want my birthday back that this revision has stolen from me.

Almost there

2011-05-23T10:42:00.001+01:00

Stupid exams tomorrow. And Wednesday. And Thursday. Pah.

Still, there are (just under) 24 Krispy Kreme donuts waiting to be eaten today ... much better than a cake, that's for sure!

Rapture

2011-05-21T12:32:00.000+01:00

Right, apologies to all involved - I'm quite busy today, so my Rapture party will be held tomorrow instead of this evening. Very sorry if this affects your attendance, but if not, see you tomorrow!

Sketch

2011-05-15T19:29:00.000+01:00

Officially bricking it now. Just over a week to go, before I commit myself to three more exams. Sigh.

However, I am actually managing to turn my laptop off, and not be distracted by the Internet and the wonders that are associated with it. Good progress this weekend with sitting and answering questions but boy it's boring.

That said, the rain certainly helps me, as I love the sound on the skylight, and it makes me feel better that I am not missing glorious weather. Coupled with being generally a bit warmer this time of year, and revision is far more 'enjoyable' than in the Winter exam period.

Naturally, blogging will pick up over the next week, while I look for things to do instead of constant study.

Here we go

2011-05-03T08:47:00.002+01:00

See? I told you panic would set in. I am officially in panic.

And annoyingly back at work ... boo-hiss.

Reckoning

2011-04-30T09:43:00.000+01:00

That mental notion of May being closer to exams than April is about to hit me - hard. While only a day separates the two months, it completely flips my state of mind from relaxed calm, to frenetic panic and fear. I hate you so much, exams.

Oh and did anyone notice the Royal Wedding lark yesterday? It wasn't all that bad, so long as you had the sound off. I'm looking forward to a barrage of "William found Kate's ring a bit tight" jokes any day now.

Strong

2011-04-29T11:23:00.000+01:00

Another Facebook attempt at hacking my account - no less than three times in a few minutes before 0700 today.

A real nerd should know better, really. A 14-digit mixed password is pretty tricky to guess in three attempts I would have thought. Bless. Now try an 18-digit password ... and fuck off. I thank you.

The cheek

2011-04-28T08:06:00.000+01:00

Another early start for me (now simply loving the lack of traffic), but I am starting to resent anyone that actually emails me with a query. Yes, I know it's my job and I get paid to do it, but seriously - fuck off. Please.

The worm

2011-04-27T09:09:00.000+01:00

For reasons that I cannot explain, I find myself in the office this morning at 0910. Not exactly earth shattering, until it dawns on me that I have actually been here now for over an hour and a half already.

Before you ask, no, I didn't wet the bed. Well, not today, anyway.

Sweaty

2011-04-26T11:34:00.000+01:00

The last two hours have been spent 'Webex-ing" to well over 100 participants listening to and watching me try and demonstrate in Excel how to do things properly in a new financial system.

I say 'try', because I spent the best part of 15 minutes asking people half-way around the planet to fucking well mute their lines, as I could hear them rambling on, and it would "make the Webex quite difficult if they carried on talking".

Avoiding the loss of temper at work, is always a good idea, but some people are quite simply thick as pig-shit. Thankfully, a colleague sent me a secret code to mute all their lines and peace was once again present.

However, once you realise that the project boss is listening in on your demonstration of a system that you should quite frankly have no knowledge of (but are deemed a "super user" by the colleagues that should know about it), getting a bit sweaty is inevitable. Lucky for me, I probably do know more than others, so whatever I said was deemed gospel - thus no corrections required and where unsure, my back was well and truly covered (politics win!).

I now need a brisk and cool breeze to neutralise the (thankfully small) offending patches on my shirt. Thank God for dark colours and bloody good antiperspirant.

Bother

2011-04-25T16:46:00.000+01:00

The other day, I watched The Green Hornet. The other day, I realised that I wished I hadn't bothered watching it as well. It was a steaming pile of excrement.

Save your valuable time - don't bother.

Clarity

2011-04-23T13:42:00.000+01:00

Let's be totally clear and transparent on this matter.

Pizza Hut and Domino's both make excellent pizzas. However, when it comes to being the king of 'next-day-reheating', Domino's takes the crown for sure. If you disagree with this, you are quite simply, wrong. Fact.

Weather

2011-04-22T10:08:00.000+01:00

The sun is shining. It's a bank holiday. The temperature is slowly rising to something that is most certainly shorts and t-shirt worthy.

So naturally, I'm going to spend the day more or less studying non-stop. These exams won't pass themselves, and my past performance would suggest that I'm not likely to do much better either!

At least my netbook battery is rather good and I can sit out on the balcony while the sun is on this side of the apartment.

Title

2011-04-20T10:57:00.000+01:00

Part of being an accountant, requires the term "professional skepticism" - a phrase that sums me up perfectly, I must admit. I've taken a strange, new approach of being positive wherever I can with the project I am involved with, but my cynicism, or rather, professional skepticism shines through time after time.

Sometimes, I really love my job.

Inevitable

2011-04-18T16:01:00.000+01:00

It is almost certain fact that when your boss is away, you will intentionally attempt to slack as much as possible at any given time. It is similarly certain fact that you will end up working your backside off instead, oblivious to the fact that you were meant to be slacking.

Stop asking me difficult questions, people! Can't you see I'm busy trying to do as little as possible?

Realistic

2011-04-14T11:01:00.000+01:00

Last night, I promised to cook dinner. With limited time to spare before Anna was home, I decided we would have spag bol (sauce from a jar and all that lazy lark). It suggested 400g mince meat for this jar, and I ended up with a 500g packet being closest (and draining off fat permitting).

Now, serving up dinner, it should allegedly 'serve four'. I was perplexed, as Anna doesn't eat huge amounts and we both had equal portions, that used the entire mix between us. Anna ate it all, and so did I.

So what four does this serve? And as part of what? Four children? Four adults as a snack?

Another famous one is the misleading calorific content on a 500ml bottle of fizzy drink, particularly Coke that springs to mind. You and I have all bought a 500ml bottle and consumed it without second thought, but allegedly, that bottle is "two portions" if you read the label.

The bran flakes on my desk say that a serving contains only 107 calories. But read closer - a serving is 30g, excluding the milk. I've measured out 30g and I guarantee that not one person eats such a small amount for any meal, be it breakfast or snack. Let alone without milk.

What a load of bullshit. No wonder we're all getting fat while believing we are 'eating well'.

Never win

2011-04-13T09:22:00.000+01:00

Work. You can never, ever win.

Wear a tie: "got an interview, have we?"

Arrive early: "wet the bed, did we?"

Leave early (because of early arrival): "half day, is it?"

Hoof

2011-04-11T14:32:00.000+01:00

This morning, I was waiting in the queue to buy a Costa Coffee at work for myself and a colleague, when I noticed a lady who seemed fairly attractive, heading towards the queue. Naturally, being male, I noticed face and then breasts which were acceptable and ample respectively (how shallow I am, eh?).

I wasn't, however, prepared for the almighty camel toe that was completely and utterly distracting, despite the top-heavy situation. I found it hard not to look and tried desperately not to smirk.

Women - how do you not realise when this is happening? Surely it must er ... be noticed?!

If you don't ask

2011-04-06T22:58:00.000+01:00

Well, it's a funny old world.

After having work pay 50% of the cost of a netbook that I end up keeping (!), I've managed to somehow get an extra 3 days off due to time in lieu of travel (Romania and Dubai). Not bad, considering that on one of those days, I got pretty much wasted on less than £15 - which I might add, I didn't pay for either.

No complaints, though!

Mockery

2011-03-31T22:18:00.000+01:00

I'm currently conducting a Facebook ~~experiment~~ mockery - more details to follow.

It's ... me ... ?

2011-03-25T21:48:00.000Z

Anna's car is in getting the inherently fault clutch looked at, so I volunteered to take the courtesy car, as I am more used to a petrol car than she is. I was told that the replacement would be a Civic, from 2010, so not so bad.

But the person who has it, didn't return it on time. So I got lumped with a tiny Volkswagen Fox. In silver. A Silver Fox. Brilliant!

Too long

2011-03-24T22:43:00.000Z

I think it is safe to say that when the motion sensing lights in the bathrooms at work turn off because I've been spending too long playing Pokémon on my DS sat "on the toilet", it's probably a sign that I need to get back to work.

No shit

2011-03-23T19:08:00.000Z

This evening on my way home, sat at traffic lights, I made an observation. That observation was a squirrel crossing the road in a very relaxed manner. It then hopped up on to a wall on the other side of the road, and proceeded to take a piss down the wall and casually walk on by.

That is all.

Optional

2011-03-22T09:37:00.000Z

Since when did red traffic lights become optional? Seriously - the number of people that simply carry on driving through them (not even close to "just making it through") marginally avoiding accidents is frightening.

Oh well. Hopefully natural selection will intervene sooner rather than later.

First glance

2011-03-17T15:28:00.000Z

This one might throw you at first - can't say it's exactly the best form of marketing to appeal to all, but I suppose it's worked a treat.

Chocolate box

2011-03-16T22:00:00.002Z

So that work voucher for £100 has been converted into £100 of Thornton's Chocolate.

Yes, £100 of luxury chocolate. See you in a few stones.

Rocking

2011-03-15T14:10:00.000Z

I think this really speaks for itself.

A mix

2011-03-14T11:53:00.000Z

Champagne, beer, vodka, tequila and rum.

Not the greatest mix of alcohol over the course of an evening, but that's how things panned out (in order). Suffice to say, the after-effects on Sunday morning were not pretty, but a 'Miss Marple' marathon on the television seemed to dull the banging headache caused by the night before.

Why do I never learn that a great night out on a Saturday must come at the price of a shit Sunday stuck in on the sofa?

Motivation

2011-03-11T15:17:00.000Z

How to motivate me? Advise me that I need to do someone else's work. Bugger - can't drag this one out, can I?

But there's more. Advise me that it's critical to our project and that without the work complete, we can't move on and launch on time. Sure, okay - I can deal with that - people need it done, so I'll get it done.

Though that's not the end of it. Advise me that it may involve going into work on a Saturday and/or a Sunday to make sure it's done on time ... and you'll find that I finished the work ten minutes ago.

Failed

2011-03-09T13:37:00.000Z

What's that? It's March 9th and already you've failed your New Year's resolutions?

Well, don't fret - because there's a new fad in town for you to pretend to obsess about.

Introducing, new Lent! For all those people that can't quite stick to their guns for a whole year, new Lent! allows you to condense resolutions into a tidy 40-day period, so you can fuck-up even quicker.

New, Lent! For abject failures, in a workplace near you now.

Reprise

2011-03-08T22:35:00.001Z

£100 voucher and champagne for being awesome at my job?

I thank you.

Memory

2011-02-27T11:06:00.001Z

I forgot my mum's birthday. Bugger. I'm in deep shit now ...

Terra Firma

2011-02-25T09:21:00.000Z

Back on UK soil and quite frankly, glad.

Seeing the world is great, but it remains far more interesting and enjoyable when you are doing this for pleasure and not for work. Yes, I was paid to travel to Dubai, Japan, Romania, Sweden, Denmark and the USA twice, but you never quite get the amount of time to have fun that you think you will.

Weirdly as well, I kind of miss the moderately cold-ish weather. Strange.

Sad

2011-02-23T05:06:00.002Z

Duty free at Dubai is NOT cheap.

/lesson

Opposites

2011-02-22T04:43:00.000Z

I couldn't be any further from the pricing of Bucharest, naturally. Dubai is impressive in every sense of the word, including the prices of alcohol, assuming you can find somewhere that serves it.

Generally, this is restricted to hotels and a few other private establishments, so having opted to go to a hotel restaurant for dinner, I had a very large and cold Peroni. Well, it was a pint, but it felt like it was bigger.

Bill arrives. About £8 a pint (not that I'm paying). Epic prices, a far cry from £1.20 (ish) in Bucharest.

Epic ...

2011-02-21T06:18:00.000Z

Dubai. Wow.

That is all.

Bonus

2011-02-19T08:48:00.001Z

Well, let's be honest. Travel, airports, smelly people, waiting in departure lounges ... it gets tedious - fast. But today, I'm particularly chipper about my work trip to Dubai.

Yes, I was up at the unholy hour of 0600. Yes, the taxi pickup phoned me after the agreed time to advise he slept in and wouldn't be able to take me to the airport. Yes, I had to drive myself and use the absurdly priced long-stay parking facilities and yes, I'm fucking tired.

However, work tend to fly us business class, where the flight is over a given time period. Bucharest, didn't quite cut the mustard, but Dubai? Business time! Though a pleasant surprise checking my itinerary - I've been booked First Class seats with British Airways.

Absolute result.

So allow me five minutes of feeling quite smug from the executive lounge, with the free pastries, coffee, booze and WiFi, but spare a thought for when the genuine First Class passengers are absolutely mortified when they see a twenty-something scruff-bag waltz into the posh seats.

Having had travels in business class before, I make a point of not shaving, being scruffy, wearing jeans and generally looking like I ought to be somewhere else. It's priceless when you hand your ticket over and turn the other direction in the plane and I hope someone posh complains that I am not suitable (as if anyone ever would!).

On a side note, I've lost a fair few personal hours/days to travel of late, so can someone remind me to pester work for some time off in lieu? Many thanks.

See you on the other (sunny) side.

Sheikh it, baby!

2011-02-18T11:21:00.000Z

Next up, a timely trip to Dubai. I know, I know - it's not fair, is it?

It's not even the end of February and I will have been to the Caribbean, Romania and Dubai - the latter two paid for by work. Most people abuse work expenses, but I always feel somewhat guilty about it, as business class tickets are quite frankly, absurdly expensive (go have a look if you're unsure).

Still, I'm enjoying getting all these new stamps in my passport, as I would probably never get the opportunity to travel to these places otherwise. I'm insanely lucky, really. More so when there is yet another potential trip on the cards - back to the USA again. Not for definite, but still a chance.

I do hope so, as I really want some more Levi's, but refuse to pay £100 for them. Fuckers.

Anyhow, some updates will be posted from the UAE while I am there, so keep your eyes peeled. Mum's parting advice was: "Don't brush by any of the women - they tell lies!"

And she was deadly serious.

Low

2011-02-17T12:40:00.000Z

It's just coming up towards 1pm more or less. A couple of pretty important meetings out of the way, so all going well. Got my Crunchy Nut Clusters for lunch (yummy) and finally, a toilet break.

But it's at the crucial moment that I go to take a wee, when something isn't quite right. Urinal? Check. Bathroom empty? Check. Flies? Wait a minute ... they're ... already undone.

Bollocks. I hate it when you are walking around for half a day flying low. Especially with white boxers on.

Book of revelations

2011-02-17T00:18:00.000Z

Charlie Chaplin was ... no, is a Romanian. I have proof and I saw it with my very own lens.

Return

2011-02-15T12:34:00.000Z

Well, my final few hours in Bucharest are drawing to a close.

Will I be sorry to leave? Probably not; I'm quite anxious to get home and back to normality. The excitement of long-ish haul work travel is fun for a while, but it wears thin quite quickly. Trust me on this one if you have any doubts.

Otopeni, here I come!

Corporate love

2011-02-14T06:57:00.000Z

While I openly admit that I have previously found Valentine's Day a bit of a corporate money spinner, it has dawned on me that when you are in a relationship, it's best to probably avoid maintaining such a stance. Ever.

The best thing is that once you start letting go a little, it's not all that bad, so long as you and said opposite have a sort of "agreement" as to how involved you'll get, it's actually enjoyable.

Yes, the cynic in me says that it's all about drumming up sales of cards and gifts at a time of year when people are skint, but hey-ho - it's not the end of the world as we know it. That's in 2012.

Happy Valentine's day all - single, attached or polygamous!

Pruned

2011-02-13T09:46:00.000Z

I neglected to mention before now, that I was provoked into re-assessing how I use Facebook. I openly admit that I enjoyed seeing how horrible people from school weren't exactly having a wonderful time, but in reality, why should I still care?

Well, I ought not to care and in reality I don't - I think I am more nosy than anything to be honest (and a bit of gloating never went amiss either) and there's not really anything to gain, is there?

So the Facebook cull of 2011 kicked off two nights ago and I removed in excess of 200 of my 360 "friends" from my list in one fell swoop.

Finally, my news feed is full of mainly intelligent comments and postings and no more crap about how someone's child isn't receiving maintenance payments from the chav father, or how "guna gt steamin 2nite!!!" and so forth.

I almost view this as a moderate form of 'elitism', but then I bet there are many people who can relate to having "friends" on Facebook or other social networking sites, that they have no intention of ever speaking to again and have not done so for a good few years.

My only real curiosity, was whether anyone would notice that I removed them. Most likely not, and the element of intrigue will pass shortly there's no doubt.

Still, I feel better for it. More so, as I refrained from the obligatory "If you can read this, I didn't delete you - well done" etc. Go me, eh?

Plus one!

2011-02-12T18:27:00.000Z

So my training colleague and I went out into Bucharest today. Epic journey.

Booze is so cheap; eight pints cost us a mighty £13, while two rather large pizzas in a certain hut of pizzas, cost a mighty £13 again! Brilliant. A day out for £26 for two people. Not bad really, considering the epic randomness that the city contains (yes, I took a few photos).

Relative

2011-02-11T14:56:00.000Z

Bucharest (yes, still I'm afraid) is a funny old place. Many things cost comparatively the same as back home in the UK, but the taxis are shamefully cheap.

Imagine if you will, a 5 mile/35 minute journey across London in rush hour. I've been there and done that in the past with work, so not cared about cost (as they reimburse me). But when I come to think about it, the journeys were around £15/£16 guaranteed.

The same distance/time/stress here is a whopping ... £3 - and rarely a jot more. Unbelievable. It was only a while after I tipped a very stressed taxi driver the equivalent of £1 (or 33%!) to watch the transformation into a very pleased taxi driver, that the pathetic cost dawned on me.

Always strange how a Big Mac, a laptop or Gucci handbag is almost on parity, but other things are absurdly cheap. Can't say I'm complaining, but I would prefer it if the shitty little Dacia taxis had seatbelts.

Canine

2011-02-10T13:53:00.000Z

Dogs. There are lots of dogs here in Romania.

No, not a scathing attack on unattractive folk, but rather an actual observation of the canine variety. There are a lot of dogs in Romania, most of which seem independent.

I'd say wild or feral normally, but these are neither. Nor do they appear "stray". They simply appear to have their own community and I don't doubt an elected Government too.

They use zebra crossings for god's sake, and cars stop for them to let them pass. What's that all about? When did dogs get the same rights as humans? (insert controversy here)

Jokes aside, it's proper mad. Really.

Careful

2011-02-08T19:59:00.000Z

Let me explain this to you, as well as I possibly can. I mean no harm or detriment (for once), but I have to say that Bucharest in the winter, is an extremely depressing city.

There are some absolutely stunning buildings with the most intricate and fantastic architecture, but the dull tone and palette of this city does them no justice in the winter months. I suppose a metre high of snow slush does no city many favours, but nonetheless - I have to admit that I am frightfully more cheerful inside, than outside.

Perhaps this will change over the weekend? Perhaps the room service will have grown thin by then? Perhaps the somewhat desolate feel will give my photo-trigger some inspiration?

I hope so - as the alternative is constant studying. Which is not a bad thing either.

Unexpired

2011-02-07T21:02:00.000Z

Well, I'm here and alive. That's surely saying something, right? I mean, bleak surroundings and crazy drivers aside - I've not yet expired.

In fact, I may even go as far to say that ... I am almost looking forward to checking out the city over the weekend.

Almost.

Proof

2011-02-05T00:55:00.000Z

I was there ... here is resounding proof.

Fine

2011-02-04T19:11:00.000Z

I'm working from Bucharest in Romania on Monday until Tuesday 15th Feb.

Any pointers, other than wearing a stab vest and carrying a rape alarm?